Mom knows I love The Home Depot. On Saturday mornings, they have extra treats for me. I get lots of attention because I am so wonderful. (That’s what my mom says anyway.) Oh, and did I mention their spacious carts? More room for those extra treats! Happy!
My recipe? Look like I am working out so Mom will let me eat the giant #chocolatechipcookie she made. (Hee hee hee!)
I hate it.
I posted this on Instagram today, but it’s worth repeating. “Mom, are you trying to fool me with that new low-carb food?” #ThrowbackThursday
(My mom made me do this. I don’t like going to the veterinarian. I get anaphylactic.)
Doctor: What makes you bark at your neighbor’s Chihuahuas?
Charlee: I don’t know. It must be a reflex.
Doctor: How does it make you feel to see the Chihuahuas?
Doctor: Why do you think you feel irritated?
Charlee: Well, first of all, they wear bandanas all summer and silly kilt-type jackets all winter.
Doctor: Why does this irritate you?
Charlee: Maybe because they seem so prissy. And don’t forget, they start it all – the barking, I mean. They taunt me.
Doctor: How do you think the neighbors feel when the barking wakes them up?
Charlee: Mmm, probably not exactly thrilled.
Doctor: What is your goal in barking? What is it you feel you are accomplishing by barking?
Charlee: They need to know how silly they look wearing scarves. They are male Chihuahuas after all.
Doctor: Do you think perhaps you may be suppressing feelings of attraction?
Charlee: Boys wearing girls’ accessories? Absolutely not.
Doctor: Wasn’t your sister, Bandit, (may she rest in peace) part Chihuahua?
Charlee: She was. But my neighbors are nothing like Bandit. Bandit wore a denim visor.
Doctor: Have you been spayed?
Charlee: I am 10 years old. Is this question even relevant?
Doctor: How old were you when you were spayed?
Charlee: Is this a HIPAA violation? How much is my mom paying you? I think our time is up now. I gotta go potty.
Have you seen the new TV commercial where the dog with bad breath is ostracized by his friends? My tip for #WellnessWednesday is to remind everyone to brush and floss daily after meals and before bedtime. And, if you don’t like mint or bubble gum toothpaste, I highly recommend the poultry. Cheers to your health!
It happened last July right outside her office door. It was a LONG way to the 115-degrees-Fahrenheit, pet relief area. (Remember, this is Arizona, and I had to go really badly.) So, I just squatted and pottied on the rug. Right? Oh, what a relief it was! And truly, according to my nose, other dogs had pottied there in the past. It was no big deal. I got scolded, of course. But, it was worth it.
I found my darling Charlee’s (RIP) letter to Santa in her box of unpublished blog notes.
“Dear Santa, My mom said it was naughty for me to take my chew toy outside when I go duppy. But, I have to admit, I found it rather nice. Your call, Charlee”